“I am a Lumberjack and I am OK…” as Pythons would say

Greetings Sentient Beings

Always extraordinary, abounding with creatures and vistas that simply take your breath away, the world in which we currently find ourselves is becoming increasingly astonishing. Thus, I will refrain from ‘mentioning the war,’ in order to protect someone but am having serious doubts about the likelihood of dead parrots surviving once someone gets hold of that episode of the Python’s Circus.

So, warning, warning to those of faint heart: DO NOT READ THIS WEEK’S diary. DO NOT SUSPEND YOUR DISBELIEF! The following may contain language or concepts which some people will find offensive, even if true, or disheartening or worrying or ridiculous.

 

 

DO NOT READ ON

However, I ask you to

Imagine this:

Time – POST JUNE 1st relaxation of social isolation regime Level 2 as per State Government regulations.

CAST:

Staff employed by a local council recognised world-over for an obsession with crime scene tape

The Queen of clean and caring (Queen of C & C)

5 X innocent Open Studio attendees (including 2 x executive committee members) (IOSAs)

The bread & possibly the oven in a cameo appearance

The EVENT (aka the crime):

In the custom of cultures, civilisations and peoples past and present, of all races, colour, climate and religions, the Queen of C & C was inspired to believe it would be a heartening welcome-back ritual, to ‘break bread’ with Wednesday’s Open Studio attendees (IOSAs)and further, to underline the  sincerity of that gesture, for herself to be the one to bake that bread in the kitchen, in the above mentioned council’s oven, set inside the buildings of the unnamed Historic Village.

A member of the said Council staff, let’s call them R…., witnessed the 6 IOSAs in the same room, juggling from hand to hand, freshly baked, piping hot bread dripping with molten golden, salted butter steaming straight from the crime scene tape obsessive council’s oven. It is possible the IOSAs were momentarily less than 2m apart at the point they collected their too-hot-to-handle-without-a- serviette, bread pieces before returning to their previous social distancing positions. Perhaps it would have been better if we….whoops…the IOSAs wore masks while eating?

And so, on an otherwise fine and blue-skied day, a blistering complaint to an unidentified Gallery Co-ordinator from MCCouncil staff arrived citing the crime of breaking bread together.

GUILTY, I think, Your eternal fragrant Worshipfullness… of friendship and caring and enjoining community pleasure and connectedness.

And so, if you see the police hauling off to places of confinement the Queen of C & C  along with an Executive Committee, do not worry. We will always fly the flag, person the barricades to the cause and fight for truth, justice and the breaking of hot, freshly baked bread together, forever! Viva le Pain!!!!

 

 

or perhaps Mitc….Council  could reinstate the old lock-up in the central court? The bolt still looks like it works quite well.

Which side of the lockup do you want Sanya?!

PS – the bread was so so good!!

 

 

I would like to recommend Alain de Botton, author, philosopher and  co-founder of “School of Life”. De Botton is seeking to popularise philosophy in a light, often humorous and entertaining way. His writings include bestsellers like How Proust Can Change Your Life , Status Anxiety, The Architecture of Happiness, The Pleasures and Sorrows of Work, Religion for Atheists and Art as Therapy  . The Consolations of Philosophy, book I am recommending today,  is De Botton’s take on “self-help” books, through conversations with six philosophers from the history of philosophy.

Next week I hope to feature another guest tillage expert.

PS. Dear Basil, I can’t help it. It’s my nature. I am going to mention the war – just once…..

THE WAR!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

Photo Credits

Photo by Abby Savage on Unsplash-Lumberjack

Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash-Love

Photo by Dayne Topkin on Unsplash-Be Kind

Photo by Renee Fisher on Unsplash-Love harts

Photo by Jonathan Meyer on Unsplash-Peace